Dating Indonesian Girls
Apr 4th, 2006, in Society, by PatungDating Indonesian women may not be for everyone.
Indonesian women, particularly on the island of Java, are exceptionally beautiful. They tend towards the very feminine side, with lovely skin, are not too tall, and have knock-out smiles. There’s plenty of plus on that side of things.
If wer’e to be honest we have to recognise that many men are interested in a woman who will take care of him, do the housework without complaint, and take care of other matters similarly without much bother. Your average Indonesian girl often fits the bill in this respect, certainly more than your average western woman, the less said about them the better.
On the other hand going out with Indonesian women in a romantic way can have many mysterious pitfalls.
Some women here are clearly only interested in money. Some men are unbothered by this. Others of the female variety, can, once we get to know them very well, come across as practically insane, hysterically emotional, scheming, over-possessive, inclined to, usually fake, attempts at self-harm in order to get their way. As I said, not for the faint-hearted.
There are a few Indonesia dating websites although the area is not nearly as developed as that in nearby Phillipines or Thailand. To begin your online journey on the Indonesian dating scene our very own “Meet” section has many a lady eager for company.
4,898 Comments on “Dating Indonesian Girls”
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Nay says:
This is where we need to step it up a little and have some standards in play guys. It’s time we got picky.
Yeah,… I’m still living the bachelor lifestyle…. but you’re right. Not all women are created equal.
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Max says:
So in my opinion, a woman deliberately using a man for money only really occurs outside her own mating period, when she’s not looking for sex! But wait a minute…. why would she do this? Maybe because she wants some sucker male to spend resources on her to look after the baby… that isn’t even his!
Startling insight. That is really food for thought.
Timing is so very important.
Strike while the IRON is HOT.
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venna says:
Wow. Getting steamy around here in just one night…
I just read Bobby’s posting. And what I got is that the girl is simply just a desperate insecure girl. I haven’t seen indication that she’s after your pocket or green card, at least not yet, except if you let yourself fall for the first time. And if this is what she’s looking for for you, well, I can say that she’s doing her homework pretty bad. Because it won’t attract the prey, instead it gives a hint to him to withdraw and gone.
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Timing is so very important.
Strike while the IRON is HOT.
…. which is just the problem. How are you going to know which ladies are in heat or not?
🙂What’s probably easier to calculate is that if you haven’t had sex with the lady you are courting within the space of one month…. chances are, she’s getting it elsewhere!
Women love attention so much that they will mercilessly drag around guys who like them, leading them on with the idea of sex, while the woman themselves is already getting it somewhere else.
This is why if you feel you are being manipulated…. you probably are! You’re being lined to up to be cuckolded. -
ET says:
…. which is just the problem. How are you going to know which ladies are in heat or not?
Can’t you ask them?
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deta says:
Deta is right, of course we are all captivated by the beautiful women, even other women are, but don’t run. No. Don’t do what she says. Don’t be scared of her
Do I look scary? Damn, it must be the new eye shadow I experimentally put on this morning. I’ll be back to my natural look tomorrow.
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…. which is just the problem. How are you going to know which ladies are in heat or not?
Women’s menstrual cycles usually coincides with the moon phase cycles.
What’s probably easier to calculate is that if you haven’t had sex with the lady you are courting within the space of one month…. chances are, she’s getting it elsewhere!
That’s nothing to be jealous about though.
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bs says:
Women’s menstrual cycles usually coincides with the moon phase cycles.
Hahaha. Did you consult Ponari about this? Bollocks!
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brian A says:
What’s probably easier to calculate is that if you haven’t had sex with the lady you are courting within the space of one month…. chances are, she’s getting it elsewhere!
VERY GOOD CALL
@Bobby
Today I saw a huge fat bule with an indonesian/indonesian-phillipines looking woman, maybe he had the personality that you are missing .. but it was a funny match and I had a good laugh and imediately thought of ‘I.M’!So if I was you I would get to know her, what she has done with her life and why she is so in love ith you. Maybe you are too conscious about what people think, instead of enjoying her tell you that she loves you. Have fun and dont think too much about it.
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What’s probably easier to calculate is that if you haven’t had sex with the lady you are courting within the space of one month…. chances are, she’s getting it elsewhere!
________________Do you guys really have this a month-deadline in your mind? What you guys do if in one month you cannot score yet? Look for another options?
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Do you guys really have this a month-deadline in your mind? What you guys do if in one month you cannot score yet? Look for another options?
I have a month-long deadline in my mind…. and I’m always out meeting new women anyway. Women do the same thing, so there’s nothing new there.
Honestly, it doesn’t take very long to hook up if there’s chemistry there.I begin to start thinking that the woman isn’t interested in me sexually if she’s holding off doing it for so long. If she can wait that long… she’s not that keen on it. A girl who IS keen on me will want me in a short space of time and not mess about! However, if she’s not interested in me sexually…. there’s REALLY no point pursuing her further. Who wants a sexless relationship?
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Honestly, it doesn’t take very long to hook up if there’s chemistry there.
__________________Agree. But maybe it is a little bit different with Indonesian women. We are very aware and concerned on what other people saying about us. Premarital sex generally is not accepted socially although recent studies show that they are more permissive. I have some friends that prefer to be old virgin ladies than doing premarital sex. And some Indonesian men (again, I do not generalize) also have the same concern in their mind. They will see women who cannot hold theirs as cheap. They still try to score it too, but after that, they leave the women. That’s why not much Indonesian women able to be honest about this. And honestly, it happened to me too. After two-three weeks, I started to be bitchy; nagging, yelling, unreasonable, and detached. Because I didn’t want to admit that I wanted my bf more than just a romantic dinner. It felt so shameful. I even was fasting so I had more reason to stay away from him and relieved when finally we broke up. I could not bear the pressures, both from social or religion.
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Bobby says:
Hey guys,
WOW sorry i havnt written in a while been busy but ya im really suprised by the amount of comments recieved by my one post! LOL thanks for all the advice guys it really helps me put things in perspective but of course i still have some concerns. To answer some of ur questions i met her through a friend of mine here in surabaya so i guess thats better then meeting her in a pub or bar which of course i know thats not good and most of those girls are bitches or whores (no offence to anyone just the way that ppl just girls that hang out in bars and drink and smoke etc)and she is a nice girl. We had just had an argument when i wrote that so i was a bit pissed of and just need a second opinion from someone. Just my concern with her is that she “might” be using me for money or green card but im not really sure thats her intention cause even as bad as our arguments have gotten she has still come back to me and seemed faithful. But of course no relationship is perfect and i do believe one day she will see my true colours and even though she loves me she will eventually run to someone else but that could just be my paranoid thoughts. Now of course this might or might not be relaevant but when we first started dating we talked about sex and she told me she didnt want to have sex b4 marriage and i respected that thinking it was normal thing here but 4 months later for either the reason that she truly fell in love with me, or for the reason shes trying to make me think shes in love with me, we did. But the weird thing in this country is and makes me realize that the ppl here are a bit (forgot the word) and say one thing but mean another. for example with the sex: girls are not to have sex b4 marriage or are considered whores or bitches but for men its ok thats wat ive heard from ppl so who are the boys meant to have sex with? obviously not each other (but if thats ur thing ok) and not with prostitutes then with their gf right? But wat makes me maddest of all and wat venna said was that the guys have sex with these girls and then leave them cause their too easy? are u fu**ng serious? thats so stupid and small minded idiocrasy!!!
but ya anyway cheers guys and sorry if i write too much lol
BOBBY
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@ brian A
I have a theory about that and it might be stupid or wat but mostly when i see skinny or attractive girls with fat bf i immediately think that she just putting her hand in his pants and grabbing all his money…..now that could be stereotypical but about 90% of the time its true and the guys dont care cause they look “cool” and they get wat they want until they find another girl or watever happens. humm ya anyway ill see what happens and if anyone got anymore theories or coments id like to read. really like this website good to express ur views with others. Just a general question for u all and just for my curiosity where are you ppl from and where are you living? its ok if u dont want to tell just fun to know. I live in surabaya indonesia and from melbourne australia.
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But wat makes me maddest of all and wat venna said was that the guys have sex with these girls and then leave them cause their too easy? are u fu**ng serious? thats so stupid and small minded idiocrasy!!!
_________________Welcome to Indonesia, Bobby.
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that’s german right?
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it means mude nach ficken if i remember correctly…
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Inez says:
@Nay,
Who wants a sexless relationship?——————————————–
On the top of my head….
A self respected girl who wants to be sure that the man really loves her and not her body only..
I can wait until marriage, and any serious guy who cares about me should also wait until marriage.
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A self respected girl who wants to be sure that the man really loves her and not her body only..
Oh my God…. don’t you see what’s going to happen to you with this line of reasoning?
If you make a guy wait…. he’s going to NOT LIKE YOU as a person for jerking him around like this… but guess what? He’ll wait for you….. and according to your logic, you’ll really start to think that he likes you as a person BUT BECAUSE you’re making him wait, he’s going to go out and see other women while you make him wait. Some of the other women he meets DON’T make him wait!
One of two things happens then. Either he forgets about you entirely, OR eventually after having made him wait for so long you give in and have sex….
The very MINUTE you give him any trouble whatsoever after that point, he will abandon you… because he never really liked you as a person for jerking him around so long. Now having had sex, he abandons you!WAKE UP TO YOURSELVES!
Making the man wait is utterly futile!Honestly, if you can’t tell if a guy likes you for you or not, I suggest you learn to read people better. This whole “make him wait” nonsense just deprives both men and women of what they were naturally supposed to do together.
Some women are SO selfish and egocentric that they simply cannot see that their success with keeping a man squarely depends on how well the man is being treated. Do you think making us men wait is somehow being kind to us or something? Give me a break!
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it means mude nach ficken if i remember correctly…
I believe it’s muede nach ficken, if you don’t mind.
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nay
In addition to that, no sex = no fun = boring.
the only thing which could stop that concerning me was if she was the woman of my dreams.
When we turn 60+ years old (or whenever) , then we can stop having sex because our old bodies cant handle it.bobby, im from Australia.
so i guess thats better then meeting her in a pub or bar which of course i know thats not good and most of those girls are bitches or whores (no offence to anyone just the way that ppl just girls that hang out in bars and drink and smoke etc)and she is a nice girl.
Typically that is better, but I drink and smoke almost every day, so sama-sama is the term i think, that is why I have a GF from the clubs at the moment 😛
If I was you I would get as much sex as you can and enjoy your stay in Surabaya, dont give her money, and if she says she loves you then go with the flow, dont be freaked .. you are only dating her mate!
cheers brother
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@ Bobby
You’re dead right about women saying one thing and then doing another. That’s women the world over mate. Not just Indonesia. You have to judge women by their actions and not what they say. One minute she can be saying that she wants to wait until marriage, and then next minute you can have your hand down her pants and she wants you right then and there.
Despite all the things women say about waiting,… they are human beings who need sex just like men do, and they will do it… and then make all kinds of lies and excuses about it to avoid being judged by a society that only understands a broken set of rules to determine human relationships.
Women say things that they FEEL in the moment, and once her feelings change, so does any thing that she ever said or promised… (oh boy, how much fun does that become if you ever get married)…. so basically it pays to ignore some of the irrational nonsense they say and watch what they DO.
We had just had an argument when i wrote that so i was a bit pissed of and just need a second opinion from someone.
Arguments shouldn’t happen in a normal relationship mate. If you are having heated arguments, it means one of two things:-
(1) You are an angry man who needs to calm down and treat her better, or
(2) She no longer respects you anymore, and is now trying to bully you into being her slave.Now, I don’t know which one the problem is, but if during an argument you aren’t raising your voice or trying to fight her over things, then it’s probably number (2)….. but either way, the only way to deal with it is to leave her. Taking her back and forgiving her just makes it worse because it is messing with your head and if THAT’S happening, she is manipulating you (or you need time away from her, you angry man!)
I’m very forgiving of other people, but in relationships, there are certain boundaries of polite conversation that shouldn’t be crossed, and if it has been crossed, then it tends to permanently wreck them.
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pretty sound advise…
i’ve seen guys do that actually, wait for ages till they get married before they get sex, pretty amazing, not something i would’ve been able to do….
“I believe it’s muede nach ficken, if you don’t mind.” wahahaha no i don’t mind at all patung!
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muerta nada filantropa caramba in mexico!
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When we turn 60+ years old (or whenever) , then we can stop having sex because our old bodies cant handle it.
This snotty-nosed brat has probably never heard of the saying: ‘Old barns burn the hardest’.
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Yeah that’s why I married my Indonesian man, he can hold himself until we got married. He was not a very religious man and he was certainly not a virgin at the moment we were dating.
But he respects my value, he protected me. That’s a real gentleman, only few men can do that.
I see the quality of man from how they can hold themselves, their moral and religious value, leadership and responsibility.
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But he respects my value
Exactly what things do you want to be respected for? What “value” are we talking about? … and what have those things, whatever they are, got to do with sex?
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I mean, I can respect an athlete’s ability, a doctor’s skill, a scientist’s achievement….
anyway…..If a man likes you for reasons beyond sex, he’d stick with you even if you had sex on the first night of meeting him…
Witholding sex in order to “trap” a man is ridiculous!I know it’s utterly pointless to argue with women (and it’s not fun, not to mention a huge loss of man-points)… but I’m amazed when some women have an emotional attachment to their “hard to get” philosophy, despite all the logical, rational evidence.
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@ Nay
Mate, we are in total allignment. There are potentially some lucky girls out there in waiting FOR US TO APPROACH.
Well, if all she needs to do is open the door to let you burst in, you’ll surely get laid quicker than the guy that’s meandering about in his pleasure palace. Unless her room is within his palace and you couldn’t get past his guards. Although you could apply some ninja tactics by climbing the boundary walls and infilitrate the women’s chambers.
To clear up any confusion I must ammend what I said before, in that it is ASSUMED you will have a “breakthrough” if you simply keep the pressure on. But it is also clear that I mean it is NOT assumed, because I clearly state that it is the egg that only LETS one in. That is, SHE chooses. So Nay, we have no conflict here.
One thing I am certain of now, looking back on the experience with the girl I “chased” before, is that in reality I was not that into her anyway. Maybe 90%. There was just something a little bit unnattractive about her that didn’t quite jell with me. So no matter how hard you push you can’t put a square peg in a round hole (and to beat you to it, no, I don’t have a square schlong).
This is where we need to step it up a little and have some standards in play guys. It’s time we got picky.