Dating Indonesian Girls
Apr 4th, 2006, in Society, by PatungDating Indonesian women may not be for everyone.
Indonesian women, particularly on the island of Java, are exceptionally beautiful. They tend towards the very feminine side, with lovely skin, are not too tall, and have knock-out smiles. There’s plenty of plus on that side of things.
If wer’e to be honest we have to recognise that many men are interested in a woman who will take care of him, do the housework without complaint, and take care of other matters similarly without much bother. Your average Indonesian girl often fits the bill in this respect, certainly more than your average western woman, the less said about them the better.
On the other hand going out with Indonesian women in a romantic way can have many mysterious pitfalls.
Some women here are clearly only interested in money. Some men are unbothered by this. Others of the female variety, can, once we get to know them very well, come across as practically insane, hysterically emotional, scheming, over-possessive, inclined to, usually fake, attempts at self-harm in order to get their way. As I said, not for the faint-hearted.
There are a few Indonesia dating websites although the area is not nearly as developed as that in nearby Phillipines or Thailand. To begin your online journey on the Indonesian dating scene our very own “Meet” section has many a lady eager for company.
4,898 Comments on “Dating Indonesian Girls”
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kinch says:
They certainly breed them feisty in Sumatera.
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Farah says:
@ Kinch
They certainly breed them feisty in Sumatera.
…. a comment from someone that live in sumatra for .. eehhh how long my dear kinch ?????? (do you even know where sumatra is ????)
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Peter says:
@ Farah,
You`re good !! Great comments !!
Love to follow 😉 this forum.
End yes , it is true about the making money issue !! -
ana says:
Farah, with the current dumbed down quality of education in numerous western countries, many native English speaking people nowadays posses shameful grammar, spelling & punctuation skills. Even in Europe where people have easier access to learn English, many still don’t think English is that important to learn. I guess being working class Indonesians who hardly ever received anything whatsoever for free, we are used to learn to fight to be understood and to get where we are. This include what you’ve just done, giving the man his own taste of medicine;) I respect that.
Achmad, thanks for your comment as it has led to my curious little research about this notorious Madurese females’ capacity. Ever heard of the herbal pils of ‘jamu sari rapet’ & ‘jamu mpot mpot’? According to the ads, they help ‘cure frigidity & regain sense of virginity by deodorising, tightening and cleanses… (it went on with more and more explicit statements)’. I’d advise strongly, ladies & gents, to do your own homework on the adverse effects and any potential drug interactions.
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@ Peter an Ana
Thank you 🙂 for your comments. -
@ Timdog
Thanks for the “educating” comment (i just re-read everything here), i’ll try to remember that ‘ever’ and ‘never’ do and don’t.…and i will teach you things about sumatra language, we never use “nggak” we prefer “dak”(shorten from tidak)
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dewaratugedeanom says:
Peter said
@ Farah,
You`re good !! Great comments !!Farah is the living proof that the Sumatran tiger isn’t extinct.
Go catch them, tiger!
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@ dewa
..i am just a kitten (with sharp claws)… miaawww!! -
LunaticTadpole says:
@ Farah
Well, those kind of westerners won’t find that difficult, as I’ve been “monitoring” about scandals and movements about students and mass fashion in Indonesia and have a pretty good idea of what’s going on.
But that is their problem!LunaticTadpole still want a fine Indonesian .
Got any tips? Hehehe……… . .. ...i am just a kitten (with sharp claws)… miaawww!!
Luckily you’re just a kitten, not an Inyiak .
Qiqiqiqi . ..@ Ana
If we analize the ratio between europeans and britons who can write proper english,
the first will win with no doubt.
Moreover, England have risen again the students’ fee (that’s more than £3500 rise in 2 years), I think they tend to keep stupidity high, on purpose..
But still, we are talking about girls here.. Qiqiqiq . . . -
@ Farah,
Well then a little tiger i think. With, when neccesary, big sharp claws !! -
Lairedion says:
Well Farah, you can’t complain about attention. And I guess kinch is still pissed because you turned him down. 🙂
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LunaticTadpole
Education is a costly habit indeed.
Mate, elaborate what you meant with fine Indonesian? Just that a bit more detailed specifications might help us do-gooders;)
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timdog says:
… You will find few counties so obnoxiously, yobbishly stupid as Britain – but it’s got nothing to do with university fees LunaticTadpole. Jaw-dropping dumbness and a wanton absence of interest or engagement with anything other than the latest episode of Hollyoaks (English sinetron – only with gay rape and abortions) is a key feature of the simpering self-obsessed spawn of Thatcherism who clog up the British higher eductation system courtesy of parental handouts…
@Farah – I appreciate the gesture but please don’t tell me any more Sumatra language! My Indonesian is already horribly polluted with bad Javanese – I don’t need anything else mixed in with it! 😉
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@ Lunatic tadpole
… want advise ? start to think like a monk, if you could.
Good girls might sometimes like bad guys for a little bit fun, but good girls (mostly) have good family that could made her not to even think about bad guys.
Find good girls almost anywhere but not in a pubs or bars or night club, thats for sure. Once a while meet a girl there, she might good girl, but if shes a regular customers.. hehehe.. she might be a working girl then.About the inyiak.. well… i am not from west sumatra.
@ Peter
hehehe…@ Lairedion
true.. he seemed still upset..@ Ana
Thats what i am trying to say.. the definition of fine good woman have to be described i guess..@ Timdog
hahahahha ! we still have more language, indonesia do have more than three hundrends language.. too bad if you only know javanese… -
jen says:
Hi Farah,
I wish it could be that simple about good girls and family who could protect ’em from the bad guys. I almost believe this theory I read somewhere (but since I don’t read psychological journals, just random stuff from not so important sources, you shouldn’t take this seriously), love makes women produce hormone like when they give birth, even tho they’d been hurt by so many (bad) men in their life, they’d tend to forget the pain. They’d bloke all the screaming and the crying, instead, if there’s a slightly temptation to repeat the suffering, they will come with their hope high. It’s like selective amnesia!
Another theory that makes this world all colorful is, good girls are (always/sometimes/most of the time???) attracted to bad guys!
Combine the two… and that what makes people who write self-help books become millionaires. Because there are good girls out there reaching for helps to recover their (temporary) trauma over bad relationships with bad guys.
What can the family do about it? Comfort them when their hearts are breaking. Will they learn from it? Not necesarilly.
And when I say ‘they’, it’s just because I’m not sure I’m one of the good girl kind you were talking about. Hehe
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AmericanInLove says:
I am just looking for some clarity and this has been the most comprehensive blog i have seen on the subject. I am an American who lives in Australia and am required to travel to Jakarta for work. In my travels i have had lots of attention from Indonesian women but stayed away because i assumed their morals and value system were different then mine and didn’t want to hurt anyone. But on about my 5th or 6th visit i met a beautiful Indonesian women at a friends wedding and we had a great night together dancing and enjoying drinks after the wedding. She was very shy and really didn’t want to talk to me (later confessing she didn’t like the bule style) much so we smiled and danced and made arrangements to meet again at a friends childs birthday party. We met and then went out for dinner. With a Kamus in hand (her english is as good as my Bahasa but she requested her friend come to translate but my mates wife, she is Indo said she would go and backed out last minute in an attempt for her friend and myself to be alone) we charged through the night and got a little tipsy. I was a bit surprised that she agreed to go up to my room for some sleep, and in my heart of hearts i had nothing but good intentions and didn’t want her leaving alone in a taxi and i had to work early the next day. I would say that she was a bit aggressive, I was completely surprised as i have barely even held her hand or touched her much as I didn’t want her uncomfortable. I was just enjoying the calmness that came over me when i was with her. Needless to say at this point, we ended up having sex and she spent the night. When i left for work I put a rose on her pillow and a note in broken Bahasa stating that i wanted to see her again. So from there we started dating exclusively and I tell this sorted story just because i think it may be important, the situation and the way we got together.
Now, i am the type of guy who gives alot, expects alot and is loyal to the core when it comes to my relationships. I believe trust and knowing someone better then you know yourself is vital for a sucessful relationship. At this point I am an engineer who owns my own company (not rich, all my money is in the company), have had a number of great, good and bad relationships (not too many bad, more good) and am ready to settle down i think at this point in my life. Not looking for flings at all, so when i met my gf i thought she was the most amazing women i have ever met. Strong and confident but yet reserved and humble. When i was around her i glowed and felt the warmth of her heart. It was great, but now things have all changed and i am at complete loss of what to do. If this was not a mixed race relationship I might have already thrown in the towel. I have never dated an Indonesian women, or an Asian for that matter. (First let me say i have had a 5 year and 6 year relationship when i was younger so i know the pitfals and know the work it takes to make it a good relationship).
Ok here are my problems that i have obviously been thinking about, so much so that it has affected my sleeping and work a bit:
-My gf is EXTREMELY jealous and goes off the deep end for no reason other then a feeling that she has that i am lying, being “licik” or sleeping with another women. It is not in my nature to lie and personally don’t see the value in it, and i have never cheated.
– My gf plays a number of what i would call games. Trying to make me jealous (sometimes i bite!) she never tells the truth when it comes to being with men, having men friends or emailing friends and hates giving me names of her friends if i ask. But in turn wants to know every detail of what i am doing. I am an internal thinker and would assume that a person who has this quality, because she herself doesn’t tell the truth about all things, assumes other people are this way. Is this something that i am missing about Indo women. Is it just that she doesn’t want me angry (she may think i would be but i have told her i know she has a life with men friends in it and that is normal) and thinks that is more important to keep me happy then to tell the truth. What can i do to convince her that telling the truth is more important then anything? Is this a cultural difference?In my heart I think my gf (we have been together for about 5 months now) is that caring, giving women I first met, but now because of the little lies and change in behavior i am not sure if she is just looking out for herself and playing me a bit. I don’t give her too much money (don’t have too much) and she only asks for arisan help when she needs it. But when i do give her money she sometime spends it on other things she needs to get done and asks for more. This always causes fights and i try to explain that this is dishonest but she doesn’t see this point at all. She argues with me and will never admit to doing anything wrong or making a mistake. I have not given her more money on these occasions as i am still unsure of it.
I am sorry for the long winded post but and it is very disorganized but i am at a loss i need some help and some insight into the nature of all this. I know that if these sorts of things were happening in a non-mixed race relationship i would have given up. But i really do love her and want to understand her more before i do anything that may be a mistake. Any and all insight into this would be much appreciated. I truly need some insight!!!
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@ Ana
[Almost] the usual characteristics really…
Spiritual (not for fanatism neither fashion/trendy not even to escape from real life), intelligent, open minded, attractive, faithful, an artist, good cook and have that, erm.. mother thing.@Timdog
Ah, I forgot that point of view hahaha.. As I never watched TV.
But now that you make me remember, yeah.. Specially in London with those bloody giant posters about TV programs..
But still, goverment rising the tuitition fees is not really helping isn’t it ?
For example in Italy (at least Milan), the fees aren’t that high, the students heads are the same as the english ones, TV programs are WORSE, but I can find more clever youngsters although they are so blind aka strict/close minded.@Farah
Thank’s for the tips.. This Saturday I will land on Bali island and next month gonna explore Java, from east to west.. And hopefully, will find someone with at least that something I’d like her to have………….. and wanna stay with me hehehe
@ Jen
Well, you can never generalize…. If Einstein law of relativity applies, the most influenced are the girls.. qiqiqiqiqi
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@ AmericanInLove Says
Erm…….
I had those issues with my Italian x girlfriend, and heard same complaints from my friends with English and some other European girls..So I guess, it’s not about nationality and stuff……………
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@ Jen
Some how i could agree with your theory. I think love does made people goes head over heels.
Opposite attraction.. more like.. white guys like brown skinned or darker skin woman, good girls prefer bad boys… good guys prefer .. hehehe ‘trouble’ girls..
I know.. hehe.. even when i said i want to meet with mr Right, but always end up meet with the wrong one. Amnesia? hehe even its hurt honey.. theres good memories too, and i prefer to stay positive, so forget the bad and only keep the good one.
Human sometimes does silly thing and do the contrary things in their life. Its unbelievable, but it does happened.
What family could do ? well… start with advise not to talk with stranger, not to go out at night, don’t even think to go to bar, don’t do drugs, avoid 3 big NO guys (drunker, gambler, player).. you know such that advise. But yeah.. its all coming back to us again.
They can’t protect us 100% or control us that much. Broken heart is one of lesson in life, i think none could avoid from that.
To love, you have to learn to let go to, when its over of course. But i do think family do help a lot.@ americaninlove
Stay true, no games no lies, if she really good girl you will ..might had chance to be with her.@ Lunatic
..you know where to find fun girl easy there.. you wont get bored.. and yeah.. good luck with the good girl search. -
American-not-very-au-fait-with-asia-yet-but-maybe-you-will-buck-the-trend-and-develop-a-clue-later:
Pretty standard stuff – insane jealousy for no reason at all, playing little games, not displaying much sign of having absorbed too many pop-psych notions (East of Suez, you can throw Freud out the Door).
Nothing much you can do to change her. If she’s worth the trouble, then put up with the roller-coaster stuff. Otherwise chuck her and try another one.
Just thank your lucky stars she’s not a Thai 😀
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Farah
@ dewa
..i am just a kitten (with sharp claws)… miaawww!!Oh, like a Pussycat Doll?
That’s OK too, but now you’ve got my imagination running wild.
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uwie says:
Hi … I am so glad that I am still reading this article and the comments … Getting “seru” everyday …
for this homepage …
http://www.an-asian-wife.com/page2.htm
this is funny though … hehehe … glad you all mention this one … I really need good anecdote this day. But I think, maybe the story is true, we can see how they need and completed each other … hehehe …@ AmericanInLove
I don’t think that she is a good girl since she do it vigorously with you in her first night … hehehehe. – but maybe you are that hot .. heheh …
Talking about secret, all the woman have secret and choose not to tell the boyfriend the truth (at least me) because I think it is not important to tell (not important to me) and I don’t want to make unnecessary fight with my bf for something that not worthed for me …About you are cheating on her – well, it is man nature to cheated for someone else especially because you are :
1. bule – popular with their free sex
2. bule that lives in indonesia – many girls think that you are rich and handsome – even though you are nothing in your countrybut see the sunniest side – she loves you ..
she often asked you for money? hmmm … is it little money or big money? and how often? it can make a difference you know …. Have you ever ask her for money too? Maybe it is just because you owe her money too …
Anyway … don’t try to understand her .. because you can not … doesn’t matter it is interracial relationship or not … no bf will understand gf …. you just need to love her … ANd not to tell you everything doesnt mean that he lie to you … it is just not to tell you everything …
ANd about bule that attracted to indonesian girl … i found it a little bit true, I think, I am not too really sure about it … but …
Last week, I am going to Bali alone for 14 days … well because I am going alone, I am trying not to make a lot of attention to me so the thief’s not seeing me as their victim. You know just wearing shirt, short, bag and with sands in my feet and hands … really really really not attractive compare to those bule’s girl with their high-sexy-beautiful-bikini in everywhere …
But in my journey in Bali and Gili, I found that many bule (I said many in here because usually not many man easily attracted by my appearance in a short time) being attracted by me … But well maybe they like it because they just read how devoted “Indonesian wife” in that website and thinks that I am like that girl too …
Hehehe .. funny journey though … -
Tony says:
@Uwie
So you have gone from working the clubs in Jakarta to working the clubs in Bali–playing the lonely tourist no less 🙂
If these guys are such “nothing” in their own country why are most of you gals willing do anything to be their wife?? Passport, money, ticket out of a 2-class system that only recognizes the rich and or ticket out of a society that looks at women as men’s servants?
@American In Love
Dude, are you insane?? Get another one, your sweetie-pie will get the message and have you replaced with a few phone calls. It doesn’t matter if they sleep with you on the first date or on every date. The indo women are looking for the same stuff american women are, but with more gratitude, because in muslim culture the woman is looked at being less than a man in all aspects.
In any country, all women want financial security unless they are rich. Have fun but get a clue. That’s the problem with you Yankees, always trying to figure sh*t out–just accept things for face value in Asia and nothing more or you will be disappointed.
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@ LunaticTadpole
I know the theory works, but only after I saw my reflection in the mirror 9 months after giving birth to my daughter. hehehe.
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The indo women are looking for the same stuff american women are, but with more gratitude, because in muslim culture the woman is looked at being less than a man in all aspects.
…and what do we want tony ???? please don’t generalize woman in here, sorry, different culture, different environment.
And i disagree with you.
I ever work in student exchange during my university time. American student… girls, are different than indonesian student. Their thought, ambition, how spoil they are (most of them), complaining too much, complaining the way we bath, complaining the bed, complaining the foods, the cars etc. Still even complaining when daddy pay the university tuition and said daddy too controlling, etc. Many people here dying to get better education, and would crying and cant stop thanks a lot when their parent went to muddy rice field every morning to pay the university tuition.Have you ever went to West Sumatra ? woman have more higher position than men. Its have big moslem numbers, still woman rules. Dominate the family.
…. i think i also find some woman in USA JUST a house wife, cooking, taking care children etc. I see more working woman in Indonesia rather in USA. They might say they feminist etc, but i think less of them could hang on on their marriage, and family along with their WORK.
Whether they will sacrifice the job or they will have hell of family, divorce or having troubled children. And oh…. american woman usually have like what ?? 2-3 kids ??? Indonesia woman sometimes had 4-6 kids and still could manage to work, take care husband, etc, and no DIVORCE. Not because we are BEING LESS than men, but simply because WE ARE STRONGER, than most of man in indonesia, or woman in USA.
Theres some woman have lack of responsibilities, abandon their babies, but its less. Maybe you meet some of these woman, your bad luck. But theres a lot of great woman in indonesia, not well educated maybe, and had crappy job at bar, but still.. even SOME prostitute is a good mommy here.BTW, it had nothing to do with religion, sorry. Maybe in the way we pray, yes. But other than that ?? i can’t see it.
So we are not the same. Don’t generalize us once again.
If these guys are such “nothing” in their own country why are most of you gals willing do anything to be their wife?? Passport, money, ticket out of a 2-class system that only recognizes the rich and or ticket out of a society that looks at women as men’s servants?
….. and why most of you bule choose asian woman rather than woman in your own country ?? want to get out from crappy relationship, where woman rules your life ?? demand more money ?? they are too feminist ? or when ever those bule just divorce because find his wife sleep with his own best friend while hes working hard for more money ???……. OR simply because we are totally different…. unique ? much nicer ? more tender ? have brown skin ? etc.
I think its people preference.
Maybe some of the woman are really those kind of woman that after visa, ticket, money. But not all willing to do anything-just for a bule. Maybe the word is, willing to do anything for the man we love.. yeah, that could be true. Whether he is indonesian or from any other country. Too naive ?? i think yes, most of indonesian woman are !!!
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@ ALL
Thanks for the comments they are all great and much appreciated!
@Kinch
Mate, great insight and very funny. i was a bit distraught when i wrote that blog at 3am after not getting to sleep and not very confused! But the pop-pysch comment was spot on!
@uwie
Just wondering about your some of your comments:
“Talking about secret, all the woman have secret and choose not to tell the boyfriend the truth (at least me) because I think it is not important to tell (not important to me) and I don’t want to make unnecessary fight with my bf for something that not worthed for me”
This makes absolutely no sense seeing as everything and anything can cause a fight with my gf, wether it be not picking up the phone quick enough or not blowing a kiss to her when we say goodbye (we are in the long distance thing now). If that much effort and concealment are going into “trying to not make unnecessary fight” i hate to immagine how much effort she puts in on a daily basis to not try and rip my head off? The lengths she goes for these little lies astonishes me, but I think Tony said it best:
“That’s the problem with you Yankees, always trying to figure sh*t out–just accept things for face value”
That is the point i am starting to gather with this situation and the comments i have read. But uwie don’t try and justify the lying as something you or women do to protect the relationship because it’s completely self-serving with a twist of self righteous justification. Lying only causes more mistust and plants seeds of further mistrust through other facets of the relationship. Maybe because you openly admit to lying to your “pacar” you don’t trust him as well, thus the insane jealousy! “Because hey if I lie well hell it’s just natural that everyone does it.” You see where i am coming from? By trying to stop fighting by your justification, i think you are creating more problems!
“About you are cheating on her – well, it is man nature to cheated for someone else especially because you are :
1. bule – popular with their free sex
2. bule that lives in indonesia – many girls think that you are rich and handsome – even though you are nothing in your country”Hahahahahahha……….sorry just think this is fairly stupid! Let me see if i get this straight: Men cheat because they can’t help it and white men cheat even more! Hahahahahaha……..sorry i think i pissed a little bit from the stupidity of that comment.
People who cheat have other issues then just sex. If you can’t be faithful in a relationship then you have self respect issues and don’t respect others. Being a bule or asian doesn’t change that fact either………..some of the dirtiest men i have met are from Indonesian and they are married. Also, I don’t believe there is a bule society left that practices polygamy? Hmmmmmm, those filthy bule! One women, how could they! And further to that, attributes such as loyalty and respect are learned when you are growing up, and damn, i really see how the color of ones skin impacts that! Must be that the Melatonin in ones skin affects the brain! Anyway, i can go on but it’s just that dumb! again the nothing in your country comment is just as dumb as the other ones so i won’t go on.Uwei sorry to insult your comments but in the forum of honesty, why not? I do appreciate the last comment and think i will take this advice and try not so hard to understand it all! I really don’t think my gf understands why she acts so crazy other then she loves me and control herself. At least that is what she communicates to me.
@Tony
Good advice bro, i think this is going to be the best way. Just enjoy and if at somepoint my girlfriend gets to me so much i don’t love her anymore then i can step away. I don’t like the idea that one you love is easily replaced because it trivializes the whole thing but hey if you live scared of losing you never really get anything to lose!
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tony
infact i was not going to club at all … just going around and visiting and exploring new cities in there by bike. So there was no time for me to going arround to a club. If I want to go to club, i don’t have to go to Bali … Lonely? Well, maybe I am going alone from Jakarta but I easily can mingle with Bali society when I was there. I like to talk and to know the culture in there and to understand them. Because you know most of Indonesia is muslim, so if you are in jakarta, you are not see many flower “sesajen” in every spot. And many things unique in here. I talk with backpackers from many countries, and I found it very interesting. I like this journey and this adventure to Bali. i just said that I am there because I am intended to travel and enjoy the beauty of my country.
But I will not trying to figure it out if I do things like you said –> You know working to the clubs and pretend to be a lonely girl.
nothings –> maybe in their country just because of their appearence (i am not including the one that already handsome), they will not easily attract a girl. But in here. Many people easily welcome them and love them just because they are Bule. Many girls will easily attract and think that they are rich, handsome and bla bla bla. I know it because I was like those stupid girl before I work to those annoying French. It is happened to my expat friends and they are admit it. Can you see it?
@ AmericanInLove
many person agree with your comment. that not talking about everything = lying. But i stick to my thought. not talking about everything = not talking about everything. not talking about everything x lying. If my boyfriend asking me in detail,of course I will tell him all that he is asking. There is no cheating in here. If I really think that there is no way for us to continue because of another person. i will tell him the truth. there is no justification of lying. lying = lying. nothing else nothing more. dont presume everything because you feel that way. Prove it then decide it. DO it because of the fact, not because you feel it. Be a logical person. Assumption before you know the fact will blur the fact even the fact is in front of you.
– about cheating a girl because of you are bule. You are correct. That I can not generalize bule in here, it is man problem – ignoring you are bule or not. But well, i just give you an explenation why your girl friend think that way. I just know one bule from 20 who is not having a cheating problem in here with another girl easily. But I know many indonesian guy who is not doing things like this. I know it because I work with man’s environment where the woman is very rare in here. I am working in place that in radius 5 km, It is just me the only female in here. I am not counting cat and dog and ant.
In this place, far from wives and girl friend and family (maybe there is a woman in here – not attractive and their boss and their work partner – but you can easily assume me as their part – their buddies). You can really know what they are after work. many go to prostitution, many go to others wife, many go to others girlfriend that they found in here. And many dont. That is why I am talking about this one.
maybe it is dumb opinion but many will have the same opinion about me about bule is free in sex. Dont you think so?
And about melanin making a spot in the brain. Maybe you should learn more about brain and skin things before you talking about it. It is a habbit like drinking alcohol that will kill your brain cell. I dont take it personally. I know you are mad being generelize because I said bule is easily cheating just because they are bule.
ooooww… you are so nice to not insult the last opinion too … hehehehe … dont worry!!! i am not angry. I like it. To make a color in this damn place in my life. Pathetic huh!!
But dude, maybe she is just after your money! hehehe … – ignore that opinion, as i said. Prove it.
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@ Farah
Indonesia woman sometimes had 4-6 kids and still could manage to work, take care husband, etc, and no DIVORCE. Not because we are BEING LESS than men, but simply because WE ARE STRONGER, than most of man in indonesia, or woman in USA.
Farah, you are no kitten but DEFINITELY a Sumatran tiger.
Hold on, girl.
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@Farah
Who are you kidding?? What Indonesia do live in–not the one that I have lived in for sometime now.
Indonesia woman sometimes had 4-6 kids and still could manage to work, take care husband, etc, and no DIVORCE. Not because we are BEING LESS than men, but simply because WE ARE STRONGER, than most of man in indonesia, or woman in USA.
Are you including the women who are FORCED to work as prostitutes, by their husbands because the husband does not want to work?? Yes they appear to have a lot of rights and say in their own lives. You must be speaking for the hundreds of thousands female sex workers that are forced by family or by tradition to work as prostitutes in Indo, right? Your example is the Padang people of west sumatra?? One “suku” out of how many, 300 or so?? Not very compelling.
This could go on for a while but what I meant is this: In Indonesia if a woman is beaten and then divorced there is very little the court or society will do to assist her–the Indonesian courts rarely enforce child support or alimony payments. And even if they do, which requires a hefty payment from the wife’s family to the judge, the husband can simply go to another province, have a new ktp issued and be done with the whole mess. Whereas, in the west, these things are enforced and although you have times when they are not, but that is the exception not the rule.
In the west a woman also has rights with regards to her child’s education and so on. So, you see, for a woman from the muslim world, the west presents the opportunity to be a protected class rather than one that is exploited.
@Uwie
It sounds like you have received le “french tickler” and are now singing the blues because because he left you and returned to his wife in Paris. Don’t be down on all bules–saying they are nothing in their own countries.
Without them who would pay for your bill at the club (Blok-M)? 🙂 Cheers.
@AmericanInLove
Now you got it my friend. You have your own business, educated, living life on your terms?? If so, you are in the driver’s seat. Remember, in Indo there is ALWAYS another one around the corner. Once you are married there is no more fun and in many cases no more sex–at least with your wife 🙂
Rock on bro–take no prisoners and live to the fullest!
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@ Kinch
Commenting on NOT my mother language is shallow, thats for your information.
If you could write 100 words essay on sumatra language in correct spell and structure no single mistake, i could accept on your comment. If you can’t, go back to your corner with shame.
@ Lunatic
Aren’t most of westerner looking for the pure clubbing, hang out and sex and crazy stuff with some girls while they were in Indonesia ?
If they meet indonesian GOOD girl they will get bored to dead ! (virgin, no sex, No clubbing, not even drinking !) good girls rarely hang out at bars or pubs. If they need money for their family they will look from decent job. Selling gado-gado, nasi goreng, and so on ! but not selling them self.
So if they look for good girls.. they should ask the good girl with indonesia-asia standard or western standard (sorry about the standard things i say here !!) because its different cultures and different norms, beliefs, etc.