Dating Indonesian Girls
Apr 4th, 2006, in Society, by PatungDating Indonesian women may not be for everyone.
Indonesian women, particularly on the island of Java, are exceptionally beautiful. They tend towards the very feminine side, with lovely skin, are not too tall, and have knock-out smiles. There’s plenty of plus on that side of things.
If wer’e to be honest we have to recognise that many men are interested in a woman who will take care of him, do the housework without complaint, and take care of other matters similarly without much bother. Your average Indonesian girl often fits the bill in this respect, certainly more than your average western woman, the less said about them the better.
On the other hand going out with Indonesian women in a romantic way can have many mysterious pitfalls.
Some women here are clearly only interested in money. Some men are unbothered by this. Others of the female variety, can, once we get to know them very well, come across as practically insane, hysterically emotional, scheming, over-possessive, inclined to, usually fake, attempts at self-harm in order to get their way. As I said, not for the faint-hearted.
There are a few Indonesia dating websites although the area is not nearly as developed as that in nearby Phillipines or Thailand. To begin your online journey on the Indonesian dating scene our very own “Meet” section has many a lady eager for company.
4,898 Comments on “Dating Indonesian Girls”
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Pakmantri says:
Om Patung,
Apanya yang becek …………………..???? 😀
Banjir kali ah!!! LOL.
Happy New Year.
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sirlord says:
@bubblyblue
thanks for the info..any other opinions please? thanks.
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Lanang says:
Banjir bandang!
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Farah says:
@ Tony
..hehehe.. get a girl who have a real job thats my best advise to you. If you met here at bar and shes a “regular” you should be aware then. She just want the fun only.What kind of adult you think that doesn’t have a job ? she doesn’t sound like she had any responsibility to even her self, nor a self respect and you still consider her to be your future life ? euuhhh.. ever imagine what it will be if theres children involved ?
scene one :
a baby crying at night, shes using her high heels, fab make up and nice sexy gown, “honey i am going to the club, you take care of THAT CREATURE okay ? i got headache of her/his crying.. bye sugar ! oh.. by the way.. wheres you’re credit card ? i am going to need itscene two:
you’re so tired from work, and shes not home, no real food at table, home just like chaos, dirty laundry every where, theres stacks of dirty plates and glass from yesterday or days before you call her and ask where she is, and shes answer “well its your mistake, i told you to hire someone for cleaning up, sorry thats not my job, will broke my nails, and made me sweaty, you do it your self cup cake, i am at beauty saloon now ”..its so bad.. well could be worse.
I ever read this book For love of my son, written by Margaret Davis (you could google this). About a UK guy that killed by his own philipino wife. His wife is a bar worker since shes 13 y/o, yeah an ex slut. He think he could safe her, even said that to his parent that he safe a girl life (rolling my eyes).
Sometimes you cannot safe a soul buddy, especially if that person don’t want to be safe. And the best advice from the book is “you could get a girl out of the bar, but you cannot take the bar from her” (i don’t know if i translate this correctly”).@ shawty
thanks..
@ dman
yes, sure i will go if he did married me. Well he did propose me with a ring (bent down on his knee and pop the question, oh yeah.. he did that already). That time we both students, and i still have my responsibility to graduate first, my parent pay for my university and no way i will married and not finish my education. Same with him, he still in med school, kind of hard for him to take me there due to his condition.
I am not a pushy type, in this kind of relationship, understanding and patience are needed, and i give him that.
hehehe… good.. you cook. Hey i think a guy on kitchen is sexy (i think because i rarely see it). -
I have a problem though, and I would appreciate your thoughts on this.
Question. How to deal with judgmental, sexist men? Seriously, it’s like, everything you say, everything you do will be interpreted with sexual connotation. Like, if you’ve become acquainted with, say, an American architect which happened to be a male, and you’re an interior designer which happened to be a female. The assumption is always: You aim for American males, sexually. And not: You aim for Western architects, professionally, for network, or for study, etc.
Let’s give another example, if you communicate, engage in discussion and debates in English frequently, and that’s a habit of yours. The assumption is: You are looking for a foreign spouse that could save you from your miserable shitty little country. And not: You’re looking to expanding your intellectual horizon and get a grasp of the global culture surrounding you, something your own society isn’t too fancy of doing perhaps.
Why? Because you do that. Because it’s just who you are. Because you have what it takes to do whatever it is you do.How to deal with this type of men?
hehehehe…. i face this everyday on my working place. They just think that they’re a God like in Greece myth, in fact i see them as a cave man.
My own personal experience:
I went traveling by my self, backpacking to Malaysia and Singapore, just my self at 2007. At office they know i went traveling because i made statement paper for my passport and take my annual leave. And i did give them my pictures during the 18 days journey. Its not common for a girl traveling abroad by them self, i know that, and i am so proud of my self because i am able to do it.
Few month after that news spread about my journey, i went to security post and one of them said “so, is the rumor is true that you go traveling with one of the expat here??” i gasp and ask where did he hear that and he said everybody know. And then people add IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR A GIRL TRAVELING BY THEM SELF ABROAD. So you MUST BE with an expat with you and PAY ALL OF YOUR EXPENSES. The news spread with all of the “additional” including hot love story between me and a “secret” white guy from oil rigs that i met out of office. GRRRRRRRHH !!!!I am way to angry to say anything that time.
Why ? they just jealous. Most of them never even come out of my small town FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFE. They might also have this bad family education that girls can not do anything without man help.
What did i do to those kind of sentence, words that made me feel so down ?
Nothing.You just don’t want to give more ammo to these guys. Let them think we are weak, we can’t do anything, we did GREAT things just to get their attention and so on.
They don’t even realize that still…. we are one step ahead them.
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BubblyBlue says:
Bravo Farah!!! Boys… watch your sentences! he he he… Happy Nu Year!!! 🙂
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@ Buble
Thank you.. thank you.. wahhh.. coba kenal sama kamu dari sebelumnya.. aku di jakarta loh dari tanggal 20 !! we could hang out together you sound like fun btw 😉I like Grand Indonesia !
Happy new year to every body here !
@ Dman
hmm.. just saw your picture, not so bad-lah… still i could assure you could get good girl to marry, you had that “good guy” look.. hehe (sorry to be so physical). -
@ Farah
Wah, so are you still here? Ayo kita hangout yuk he he… di Grand Indo ajah… 🙂 -
Acapellorustic says:
Hi. I’m from Northern Ireland but work in China. Recently I met a lovely Indonesian girl who is working and living in the same small city as me. When I first met her I was blown away but, of course, maintained my friendly, hospitable demeanour.
At first I only saw her once every week or so at a gathering place for foreigners working in the city. Even then I would only speak to her briefly. At this point I believed that she already had a Chinese boyfriend who sometimes accompanied her – I’ve never had any respect for people who wreck others’ relationships and I wasn’t going to meddle in this one, so that’s why I didn’t speak to her too much.
A couple of days before Christmas eve she called my number (which she must have gotten from someone else). She was going to have a christmas eve dinner with some friends and invited me to come along too. I hadn’t any other plans so happily agreed to join them. It was at the dinner that I found out she was single – the Chinese guy was in fact a distant cousin. I felt really happy about this.
Next day I called her to see if she would like to have coffee with me on Christmas afternoon. She agreed and we met, had coffee. She is such a lovely girl. So sweet, open and friendly. Really genuine and sincere. I found it so easy to talk with her. We chatted for hours. We ended up having a meal together. Altogether, after six hours, we called it a night. A couple of days later I met her at the usual gathering place for foreigners. Five of us had dinner together and I suggested ending the night with karaoke for a laugh. Three of us went. After an hour it was just me and the lovely Indonesian girl. We just happily made fools of ourselves and goofed around singing. It was great fun. Naturally, we became more touchy with each other. Her hand on my leg, my hand touching her shoulder etc.. Again we really enjoyed each others company.
By this stage, she is occupying my thoughts like no other girl has before. I’m still trying to work out what’s going on with me, but I feel like I could fall in love with her! I don’t say this lightly, I am very emotionally ‘together’.
Our third ‘date’ was at another coffee bar and again we talked so easily and everything was great. When I looked at her face I just saw her sparkling eyes and stunning smile. It would have been enough for me just to let her talk, smile and laugh the whole night and me say nothing but I still had to concentrate on what she was telling me. Anyway, the evening came to an end. It was really freezing outside, she had no gloves, so it seemed natural for me to warm her hands in mine. It felt so good to be near her like that. Then the taxi came and we both got in, still chatting and enjoying ourselves. My stop came first, that’s when I thanked her for the night and gave her a little peck on her cheek! I could tell immediately that I shouldn’t have made this move (which in my country is a very common way to say goodnight to a girl you like). Anyway, I made my hasty retreat from the taxi, told her I’d call her tomorrow and by the time I’d reached my apartment door I almost felt depressed!! What is happening to me?
I texted her next day to say sorry for maybe being a bit impolite. She replied back ‘its ok, I understand’ From then on, I resolved not to be as forward next time I seen her. We keep in regular contact via mobile phone or text/email. I met her today – she’s not feeling too well so I brought her some throat lozengers. To my surprise, she had knitted me a scarf – a very nice one too! Again as we talked, we were touchy and had a good laugh at things (I dunno what we talk about really, it just happens). She called me her sahabat. She had to go to a nearby supermarket, so I said I’d walk with her there. I wanted to take her hand but in the busy, thronging street it just didn’t seem the right time or place. When I said goodbye to her I looked straight into her eyes and saw her kind, lovely face smiling back – I am smitten with this girl, she’s not a girl, she’s 25 and I’m 32. I wish I could hold her in my arms really tightly! I hope there can be something between us. I’ve had my fair share of girlfriends but this girl just seems to bring out wonderful feelings in me. I know she likes me, but, is it just as a friend? An “older brother” type? That’s what I’m really worried about. I’ve got a few “younger sister” friends already. I just wish I could know either way so that if it’s just going to be a close “bro-sister” relationship then I can stop all this daydreaming and hoping. I feel like a lovelorn teenager!! Are all Indonesian girls as friendly like she is? This is the first time I’ve met someone from Indonesia. Am I misunderstanding the body language, friendly phonecalls/texts and little gifts (eg. scarf) or am I just being a typically dumb guy unable to see that this girl does indeed really like me and I should make the move. Incidentally, I am quite a forward, but diplomatic, person and open with my feelings. I explained to her that the kiss on her cheek was just a way of me showing that I like her. So, she knows that I “like” her. I really appreciate the time you have taken to read this waffly tale but I’d appreciate it even more if you can share your thoughts about whether you think this girl is into me as much as I am into her? -
@ Acapellorustic
Indonesian girls usually wait for a “statement” from the guys saying that you like them and if you do really want to have relationship with her as a “boyfriend-girlfriend”, you have to ask her whether she wants to be your girlfriend or not. From your story, I’m sure that she likes you and somehow, it seems that she’s just waiting for your confirmation since… you already told her that you like her, why don’t you move forward by asking her out for a romantic dinner and ask her to be your girlfriend. 🙂 Good luck and you should update us about this!!! 😉 -
She called me her sahabat.
But ‘sahabat’, doesn’t sound all that romantic to me, don’t know really, maybe should just stay out of it….
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Markus says:
I personally believe there is a lot of misunderstanding between western and Indonesian Women. Not only is it culture, but expectations.
Many Girls expect to get married, and see a boyfriend as a future husband. Marriage is kind of out of fashion in the West, and most Western Guys would not consider marriage as the main priority of a relationship. This is the final part of a growing relationship, rather then the main reason to date.
Many Indonesian Girls also ‘dream’ of a better life, which they see in imported hollywood Movies. Thats means that they often expect the fruits of being married to an expatriate, as being the materialistic, lifestyle that bankrupted the USA, last year.
Most expats are worldly, and are not representative of the hollywood culture, many girls crave. So the conflict is often in expectations rather then in the reality of a relationship.
Western marriages are partnerships, with both partners workin towards the goal of supporting, and helping each other. Many Girls in Indonesia, want to be ‘looked after’, rather like a child supported by their parents and a pembantu.
So in many Marriages, the Man actually replaces the parents and pembantu, and becomes a provider, rather then a partner.
I am not cynical about indo-western relationships, but to have a successful relationship. It has to be based on love, and cultural understanding. This misunderstanding, creates bad relationships, mistrust and in reality the fact that you are often better off chasing “bar ” girls then settling into a “relationship” in Indonesia.
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@ Markus
Haha yes that depends of what kind of girls you’re having a relationship with, I believe that educated women in Indonesia will not have that way of thinking, the point is just to have a good communication between each other.Farah, help me to talk with Markus about this… :p
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MishMash says:
@ Acapellorustic
Mate… I’m not going to even try to predict what her feelings are towards you, based on on your comments.
BUT it’s fairly obvious what your feelings are towards her.
I say give it a shot, Indonesian or not, girls are almost universally the same. Make your move buddy.
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Anna says:
Markus
I agree with BubblyBlue, not all indonesian girls are raise that way.
Working family environment have something to do as-well. Some girl coming from wealthy family of course ,“the Man actually replaces the parents and pembantu, and becomes a provider, rather then a partner”. But like I said depend how they family raise them. To become responsible person or just keep going as spoil “Brats”. And yes a very good communication in the marriage are require in this manner, without this is nothing going to work, and of course love. Please do not judge this poor indonesian girls. They all not the same. No one perfect.
and for you Sir Acapellorustic, she call you “sahabat” that doesn’t sound good, mean she just want to be a good friend with you. But you might want to be clear how you feel about her, how she make you fell when you are not with her, have that spark with see her, melt when you touch her, got a goose-bump, yes that sound like You In Love Dude!!!!!
GOOD LUck. -
Farah says:
@ Acapellorustic
…hmmm…. hmmm..
Sorry.. its hard for me to see the situation from the eye of someone that falling in love 😉But from your story i know that both of you have the sparks. And bubbly is true. Most of indonesian woman, even the most modern one expect man will tell their feeling first before they tell their own. So i suggest if you, as you said being true to your self and straight forward, why don’t you tell her about your feeling ? tell her that you fall in love with her and so on.
Ask her out on a romantic date, tell your feeling, and ask her if she want to be your girlfriend.
If she is worth the shame (of being rejected) well.. go a head buddy ! make your move or you will regret it, or feeling depress because you don’t know what you feel !
I got a hinch… she like you alot.. even if she call you a brother (another asian woman tactics to feel not guilty giving a man more attention or gifts, hehehe), go a head.. give her a try !
(hehehe tell me the complete story/report if you did this okay..)Reading your comment made me blushing !! (its so sweet !)
@ Markus
FYI, not all woman dating with western/white guys thinking that they will have a walking ATM. Some woman that date with expat have slightly bigger salary than most indonesian man.And some, like me, have my very own reason. You could read my previous comments before.
If i date a white guy, doesn’t mean i am a slutty w*ore that doesn’t have real job and DREAMING of married a walking ATM so my life would be easier.
Kalo mau gitu jadi cewek gitu, jadi simpanan anggota DPR/Pejabat negara aja bisa kok ! gak perlu belajar bahasa inggris/perancis ato apalah ! gitu aja kok susah !
But sure, you partly right, theres SOME indonesian woman that too lazy to have real job and use their brain to think, and love to daydreaming about doing nothing (outside bedroom) and having hundreds US$ per months as regular incomes. Most of these girls married (or being “simpanan”)with expat and have pembantu, so they dont do dishes or washing clothes by them self, FYI.
And for the expat whos look up for REAL LOVE at bar.. its their mistake. They don’t really know the culture in Indonesia. In western country, Bars or night clubs are places to socialize. There’s kupu-kupu malam, but less. But in here, most of woman that a regular guest are “working woman” who doesn’t have real job in day time (hung over every morning at office? yeah rite !!).
Sure you are right once again about love and cultural understanding.
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Greg says:
Its very interesting to hear the stories. In listening to Harry, seems like he is not confident of himself and blames the Indonesian women for only looking at the outside. I think we all look at the outside to begin and then start the process of looking inside. When you meet someone we make judgments, are they clean, do they take care of themselves, are they polite, are they beautiful, are they awkward, are they rich, are they poor, so many things process thru our brains. Harry must highlight his good side, he is hard worker, obviously he is intelligent, he speaks Bahasa and obviously makes a good wage. Just his ability to spend money on a women gives him an opportunity for a women to get to know him in the inside. If you are shallow, then shallow women will find you. Its a viscious circle. I spent 3 years off and on in Indonesia and many different experiences with Indonesian women. Some good and some bad. Though I think my bad experience was not all that bad and probably my own fault with bad decisions. Overall I have been all over Asia, I have decided that the Indonesian women are the most beautiful both inside and out. Cheer up Harry, be more positive about yourself, I am only 5’10”. I had a good friend Hans, who was on the short side maybe 5’6″ at most but his attitude of himself was so positive, it made no difference. The women loved him and all his friends were big tall guys. Good luck Harry. Remember if you don’t like yourself, it’s hard to find others who will.
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Thank you! It’s really been great to read your own opinions about my situation. You have all addressed the concerns that i’ve had – the way I see it is one of two outomes: either we remain very good friends for the rest of our stay in China or we hit it off and share a new “journey” together. I am hoping for the latter outcome but, as they say in China, ‘yuan feng’, it’s in destiny’s hands…. Anyway, thank you all for your posts. I am very appreciative. She has gone to another city for a New Year break until Sunday, so I will meet her when she gets back and tell her how I feel (!) Part of me doesn’t want to, but I have to make sense of these crazy feelings I have for her. If it’s all for nothing, then the sooner I know the better. Sure, I’ll be crushed for a few days/weeks/months but life must go on lol! On the other hand, if she would like to become more intimate with me then I am ready to be that man! 🙂
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jen says:
@ Markus
Hmmm… I\’d be glad to find a partner that wouldn\’t rush to ask me \’the question\’. Maybe I should go to bars to find such guys.
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@ Markus
Don’t listen to Jen! Here’s a quote for you to remember : “In this life, you will regret if you never try, because never try means you’ll never know what the truth is” 😀
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shawty says:
@markus
i would like to say that 75% of ur post are right..
however, still we cant generalize people..thats true most indonesian girls have great expectation to western guy..
but the fact is if they finally stay in west countries..
all their expectation wont come true…
but if they stay in Indonesia it will mostly come to reality ( because rupiah is cheap , if the husband paid by another currency)The +sss of caucasian guys
– They usually polite by saying \’please,excuse me, thx / sorry\’ which is indo guys usually not
– Great cook !!!!
– U can stay up in bed while they make u ur breakfastThe –
– Pay mortgage together ( in Indo usually buying house is guy responsibility)
– U absolulety have to work and earn money..clean house, cooking, look after the kids and etc..Its really important to make many agreement before marrying caucasian
@ Jen
Caucasian guys are for u then..
they wont married if they can
however, visa things usually pushed them to married asian girl that they really love lol -
Sometimes I still don’t understand why a lot of this comments blaming on the Indonesian girls,western men, society, cultures or other issues. Lets get real… why can’t we leave them alone. I mean, if they like to be a paid to do something for S*x or other occupation that might not appropriate for some people then leave them be. That’s want they want to be…
And not all indonesian men are bad, not polite, or can not say excuse me, I am sorry, can not cook, Yes maam, they can cook they can do all the things that perhaps some western men can not. Who knows they might surprise you.
Girls just need to find him, the right place, the right time.:) -
@ Anna
And not all indonesian men are bad, not polite, or can not say excuse me, I am sorry, can not cook, Yes maam, they can cook they can do all the things that perhaps some western men can not. Who knows they might surprise you.
Girls just need to find him, the right place, the right time.:)You are right Anna, i never generalize indonesian man, thats why before throwing up all of the comment on top of all i kept saying my father is 100% asian.
He cook only on certain occasion like if my mom is sick, or made breakfast for her at her birthday. Well.. of course some of his cook.. are… not eatable (burnt, too salty, taste weird, etc) but what i am talking about the “intention”. He want, willing, and its sweet. And its not that hard to do. He help out cleaning the lawn, and taking care of the children while we’re young.
..errhh.. hope this doesn’t made me as a father complex girl. But he does set high bar on man that i should date.
I asks my date most of time, “will you cook for me?” and their eyes start getting bigger and puzzled face “not everyday” i said after that quickly, still they puzzled, and made me more dissapointed when they said “ITS A WOMAN JOB?” hehehe.. i would say “apa the heck !!”. In my whole live, i never even find a friend that would do that. Cook for their gf, doing nice surprises that have those gender biases (cleaning her room for her bday ?? ha-ha !!).
I am not looking for a pembantu husband.. just someone who want to see me as his “partner” with equal rights.
Of course SOME are polite. But these day hunny… i blurry see whats the difference between indonesian man and western man for sure.. as for some of the indonesian man also jerk. Love sex, have drinking habit (think its very cool), workaholic, love gadgets, like starbucks/coffee, etc. I see these in Jakarta, Surabaya, and other big cities. There’s plenty indonesian woman/girls pregnant with INDONESIAN GUYS too. So whats the difference ??Man is a man. I don’t generalize them for their skin for sure. Just slightly separate them into jerks and sweet guys.
Sure thing the thing that a white guys can’t do is wake up at 5 am and start daily activity, sport, helping cleaning lawn (maybe, hehe). And they can’t stay at home doing nothing every night and.. hehe they don’t smoke at least two packs of cigarette everyday !! 😉
Its people preference hunny ! i still like sweet indonesia guys (that taller than me and have good body..hehe)
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@ Shawty
….hmmm….hmmmm…
You seemed have more experience with expat. Well its a good suggestion tho, to made a “prenuptial” letter before you jump up into something that you don’t know.
I’ve read few blogs written by several white guys/expatriate wife, about their experiences living in their husband country. You are right it wont be easy because we are use to live in Indonesia. Its hard.. but its the consequence’s that you should take.
Easy life (or easier ?) should be living with Indonesian. Still even marrying an indonesian, its a mix between two different person from different family, culture, educational background, just two different world. You will face new challenge called “the in-law’s” once you are brought to his family.Marrying the expat the difference gap getting bigger than just the in-laws ! you could add winter (weather), if your future husband live in four season country (i surely would hibernate like a bear..hehe). You should be adapt with that. And also.. hehe.. i know western like to walk every where especially europe people, they use bicycle too. We are too spoiled with cars, motorbike, etc. And theres more things to over come.
If you could overcome this difference and could really compromise (he should be able to do this for you too) you and your marriage will survive. And oh.. one other thing.. you should be able to cast the “fear” inside you.. you know the negative thought the “…what if…” things.
Also one thing…. my mom raise us and have a job.. its no problem with her (without pembantu looh). And i think some other indonesian woman do the same, work and have children (very hard thing to do !) i adore these woman (a worker and a mom !) they are truly a wonder woman !
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calripson says:
What is this nonsense that multinationals only send 6 foot plus workers to Indonesia ? It certainly isn’t any U.S. multinational because if they had anything approaching a height requirement they would get sued day and night for discrimination. The average height in the USA for all males is 5’9″.5 and if you understood standard normal curves, that means only about 20% of US males are 6 foot plus. Harry, you obviously have some serious psychological issues. It is your psychological state and your negative low self-esteem vibe that is driving away the women. Trust me.
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Farah
Man is a man. I don’t generalize them for their skin for sure. Just slightly separate them into jerks and sweet guys.
Yes, And I see when they are jerk, is when they good looking got thick pocket, from wealthy family most man I see, sweet man i got that.Sure thing the thing that a white guys can’t do is wake up at 5 am and start daily activity, sport, helping cleaning lawn (maybe, hehe). And they can’t stay at home doing nothing every night and.. hehe they don’t smoke at least two packs of cigarette everyday !!
On this, yes/no maam. In fact, working white man are actually start they daily routine early than indo guy, clean the lawn yup. Although there is some “white trash”(that’s what they call) that just living they live,and waiting for someone or government money to hand them something.
Most jerk man i see is when they got thick pocket, from wealthy family, I don’t know I might be wrong. and also the attitude of 85% of men (no matter where they grow up, religion, or anything else) depends on how he was raised as a child. If they raised by loving parents and taught right from wrong they will turn out to be a good guy. If man are jerk than they parents were jerk. You can judge people if you meet the parents, and you can take it from there.
We both are working family and I am working my self so I don not expect a lot from others, specially from hubby. He is hard worker good father. can’t complaint.
And no matter what color skin you are, you still can found a jerk and sweet in them.Like i said we are not perfect. We just a people try the best we an to survive our life.
I am not looking for a pembantu husband.. just someone who want to see me as his “partner” with equal rights.Well in that case i am with you, That is how it supposed to be
marriage, is about partnership, we helping each other, sure sometime there is an argument, but that is part of it, you are marry someone and that’s includes all the their luggage they got.Yes it is a personal preference, Sayyyyy, are you born and raise in indonesia? 🙂
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@ Anna
.. first thing first, i was born and raised in indonesia, in Sumatra island.Yes, And I see when they are jerk, is when they good looking got thick pocket, from wealthy family most man I see, sweet man i got that.
hmm… mostly its true.. but theres some of my rich friend, guys are down to earth too.
On this, yes/no maam. In fact, working white man are actually start they daily routine early than indo guy, clean the lawn yup. Although there is some “white trash”(that’s what they call) that just living they live,and waiting for someone or government money to hand them something.
Most jerk man i see is when they got thick pocket, from wealthy family, I don’t know I might be wrong. and also the attitude of 85% of men (no matter where they grow up, religion, or anything else) depends on how he was raised as a child. If they raised by loving parents and taught right from wrong they will turn out to be a good guy. If man are jerk than they parents were jerk. You can judge people if you meet the parents, and you can take it from there.
We both are working family and I am working my self so I don not expect a lot from others, specially from hubby. He is hard worker good father. can’t complaint.
And no matter what color skin you are, you still can found a jerk and sweet in them.Like i said we are not perfect. We just a people try the best we an to survive our life.
Hehehe.. my Australian and Canadian boss went to office at 5 am, i know sweety. I am just teasing you about what western can not do.
Sure thats what i am trying to say… a jerk is a jerk… no matter what their background is..
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snehal says:
Planning to visit indonesia – Bali and Jakarta for 10 days and I found this post. Whats most interesting is the amount of comment in this page.
Now, its impossible to read all the comments but I guess I will find genuine help, suggessions and views of fellow users.
I am a 27 year software professional from India. Have been working furiously and got reasonable success. But when I look at the other side, I do not have a life actually, apart from work. I guess its time to take a break and have fun. For this reason, I am planning to visit bali and jakarta as I can afford vacation there.
now pardon me if i am being rude or if I am evil, but I do wish to find some cool adult fun as well. Do you guys can point me to right direction? May be I am sick and all, but I am a human and i also do have such needs. I am not talking about prostitution but I wish to find some place where I can have short term relations with like minded girl.
Would love to know opinions of you guys. Am I sick? If not, can you please suggest how can I have all the fun, places to must visit etc. and other tips about Indonesia, bali?
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DMan says:
snehal
Brother you got to grow up. It is not like that in Indonesia. 10 days is short and even a month may no be long either to start something. If you meet someone you like you could start a penpal long-distance friendship first and exchange email and numbers, but that is about it. You have to speak some Indonesian in Jakarta or Bali to understand the enviroment and customs but by and large in is getting more Westernized in the cities . You say Permisi- Kamu bicara (beechara) bahasa Inggris? Saya berasal dari negara India. Excuse me, you speak English. I am from India. I am sure you can find some bilingual speakers. I met one Indian guy there on the street near Blok M asking directions in English as he was lost in directions. I am sure I would have a hard time if I visited Mumbai India trying to find an Indian beauty like actress Aishwarya Rai in ten days and I would have to pick up some Hindi sentences.You could go to some club malam – night clubs, but I am not familar with all of them. I renewed my interest in attractive Indonesia/Asian women back in 2006 shopping at the malls like Plaza Semanggi. Yeah and I was flirting with them in Indonesian especially the pretty Westernized SPG females being Indonesian-American myself from the US and even my friend said a lot of the girls look at me. You got too look somewhat decent, well dressed and handsome to attract any attactive women. snehal If you come to the US then it is a different story and I could point you to the right direction especially if you have an interest in attractive white American women. I know some Indian guys who are into blonds. Later!!!
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Tony,
Oh, don’t make me feel bad. Never dated a slut myself, so I wouldn’t how it feels like. Hope you figure out the solution to your problem.
@ randomness
Couldn’t imagine how it’s like to fall for a bule or anyone foreign, they’re not my type anyways. Loving an intelligent, deep, multicultural, mature, discreetly poetic, socially and politically conscious, intensely mesmerizing, preferably good looking, tall, dark toned, with strong facial features, and a gaze sharp enough to rip your dress apart — Oh praise the Lord!, has a certain taste for hooded sweaters, easily pleased by subtle seduction, irritatingly cute when jealous, though madly finds pleasure in observing the Other from safer distance — which is definitely not his most favored trait.. Indonesian man, however, is another case.
I have a problem though, and I would appreciate your thoughts on this.
Question. How to deal with judgmental, sexist men? Seriously, it’s like, everything you say, everything you do will be interpreted with sexual connotation. Like, if you’ve become acquainted with, say, an American architect which happened to be a male, and you’re an interior designer which happened to be a female. The assumption is always: You aim for American males, sexually. And not: You aim for Western architects, professionally, for network, or for study, etc.
Let’s give another example, if you communicate, engage in discussion and debates in English frequently, and that’s a habit of yours. The assumption is: You are looking for a foreign spouse that could save you from your miserable shitty little country. And not: You’re looking to expanding your intellectual horizon and get a grasp of the global culture surrounding you, something your own society isn’t too fancy of doing perhaps.
Why? Because you do that. Because it’s just who you are. Because you have what it takes to do whatever it is you do.
How to deal with this type of men?
Anyways, new year is less than 24 hours, so happy new year to you all. Have fun and enjoy your time. 😀