Abdullah Aa Gym Gymnastiar
Dec 2nd, 2006, in News, by PatungCharismatic Muslim preacher Abdullah “Aa Gym” Gymnastiar has taken a second wife.
Abdullah Gymnastiar, commonly referred to as Aa Gym, a hugely popular preacher and holy man, has shocked the nation, particularly its women, by choosing to exercise his right to take more than one wife. Not satisfied with long-term spouse Teteh Nini Gym three months ago married a former model from Bandung, Alfarini Eridani, or Rini, 37 years old, who is divorced with one three children and currently works at the sharia banking section of Bank Panin in Bandung. poskota
Abdullah “Aa Gym” Gymnastiar.
Gym, the head of the Darud Tauhid Islamic boarding school, and an often seen presence on television screens, explains that polygamy is a legitimate practice within Islam, sanctioned by God himself, but it’s not for every Tom, Dick, and Harry:
Polygamy is clearly allowed by God, but it is not recommended. Polygamy can be done in certain ways as an emergency exit.
(Poligami ini jelas hal yang dibolehkan oleh Allah, tapi tidak dianjurkan. Poligami dibolehkan dengan cara-cara tertentu sebagai emergency exit.)
It is not clear what exactly is the situation from which Gym is seeking an emergency exit.
Gym admits that his decision has upset a lot of people, especially women. He says that the two injunctions which his legion of followers most often convey to him are, from men: don’t get involved in politics; and from women: don’t have more than one wife. He says he has already discussed political issues, like the RUU Pornografi debate, because pornography is something which damages the nation, he feels bound to discuss it.
For polygamy he says that many people in Indonesia regard it as an always negative thing. Most women are not able to accept the matter, it hurts them, he says, but there is a small group of women who can. Those who criticise polygamy, he says, should remember that it is God’s law. mediaindo
197 Comments on “Abdullah Aa Gym Gymnastiar”
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Dimp says:
Hi Mat,
I kinda understand where you are going with your words, I wouldn’t say that polygamy is a way to avoid adultery, it is just the same, the difference is that with polygamy you are actually being honest to your partner, you actually admit that you want to commit adultery, it is up to the partner to acknowledge and allow this or decide to leave the relationship.
Now before all the women start yelling, if a man has decided to open the relationship by bringing in another woman, that means he has already forfeited the exclusivity of the relationship, thus the woman can also decide to bring in another man.
BTW, the first President of Indonesia was known to be a womaniser, but he is considered a hero…… that what confuses me.
To Rockstar”¦
“supposedly, your significant one says to you that he/she wants to marry another person. in this situation what would you do?
It all depend on the situation, if my partner decided she wants to bring in Scarlett Johansson to our relationship, then I would say “Bring it on!”
I would prefer if she is honest to me rather than doing something behind my back.
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Mat Malaya says:
Dear Rockstar.
U are absolutely right that life is about winning the temptations-lust. But what we r discussing here is about the justification of polygamy by Aa Gym and not about my family. I personally dont support polygamy but I dont condemn the rule of polygamy. Polygamy is an avenue in Islam provided by God for those people who are not enough with one wife and their temptation is controlled by their lust!
I bet that u are a loving and a caring hubby.So do I! But what about other people? what about other women who is not lucky as ur wife?Hav u ever think about them? If they are not as wise/caring/responsible/pious as you, so, is it fair for God to punish them for adultery without first providing them with an avenue?
Let me share with u one true story. This early morning, my good friend rang me up and told me about his problem. His 65 years old father was arrested yesterday by the police for raping a mental retarded girl aged 23 and the latter just given birth to a baby boy and this bad news is reported in today’s newspaper. Hav u ever think about his family/mother’s feeling? So, what do u call that baby boy? Son of a what ? Tell me how are they going to face the public?
That rule of polygamy is to protect the human being hereditary. What do u feel if u found out that u are a son of a …….. ? Who should be blame? Your father(s)? what if u hav 3-4 fathers? and those fathers refuse to accept u as their son becos they are not sure whose sperm crossed the finish line! Blame your mother? She too not sure whose sperm got there first. Can u read between the line why the polygamy is permitted to the husband and not the wife?
God promised us with Heaven and Hell. Those two were created with purpose. So, the choice is yours.
Salam
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Hi Mat,
So you are saying that polygamy is a God’s gift? Then what about polyandry? Why didn’t God gave this as well? Are you saying that God is unfair? Shouldn’t He/She gave the gift of polyandry too?
As your reasoning that you cannot tell who is the rightful father, there is a thing called DNA testing nowadays.
All I want to say is if you are just a horny bastard, just admit it, if you want to have more than one man/woman, admit it from the beginning, if you cannot commit to one partner then just tell him/her before you start the relationship. But don’t bring the name of God into your perverted way, don’t even mention Heaven or Hell.
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gatot says:
Assalamu’laikum,,
I see that we have ‘appointed’ our selves as informal judges for the case..
We only know one or two layers on the case. Aa Gym and his wife are healthy, mature, adult people who can handle their own problem.why don’t we stop judging and cursing some one, without even knowing the real fact..
dosa toh… -
adamaholic says:
a (revised) quote from aa gym’s smash hit song:
“Jagalah hati/ Jangan poligami..” -
Long lasting memmory says:
Plain sad Aa Gym!!!! I thought you were good guy but why did you hurt your wife?
And tete Ninih would you learn how to stand for yourself? -
Hi Dimp,
I’ve studied Islamic law for the past thirty years and I’ve never came across any rules in Islam that Moslem wife is allowed for polyandry! What do you mean by those sentences? God will never be unfair! Human being is. Polyandry is practised by some small isolated chinese community whereby a woman is allowed to practise polyandry. (correct me if I’m wrong). Of course I know DNA test.
I’m enhancing the provision of the Islamic rules and not about manipulating the Islamic rules for their self lnterest. Aa Gym is wrong should he manipulated Islam in justifying his act of polygamy. His intention to marry his 2nd wife has got nothing to do with any of the Islamic rules. His intention came from himself but not from any order or rules in Islam.
To God we surrender. Salam.
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Puspa says:
Great Article; From Koran Tempo 8th Dec 2006
My applogy for those who do not speak Indonesian. This article, written by an Islamic Scholar who is studying Religious Studies in the US. It basically emphasizes that polygamy is not to be discussed within syariah discourse only. Reservation towards poligamy, should not be seen as a way to discount the syariah status of poligamy. Rather it should be seen as an expression of concerns towards establishing JUSTICE (the fundamental essence of Islam) for women — who have been placed as inferior as opposed to men.
Here.
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Mohammed Khafi says:
Mat Malaya said:
I’ve studied Islamic law for the past thirty years
In that case, why after 30 years of study do you not understand what Allah allows and what he doesn’t.
The two relevant verses in Al Quran are 4:3 and 4:129 which were revealed after the battle of Uhud, when many Muslim Warriors were killed.
“If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, ……” 4:3
Thefore 3 conditions for Polygamy in Islam:
Time of War.
There have to be orphans involved which you cannot be fair to.
You are allowed to marry only if you can be fair and just to the wives.Three reasons why polygamy is not allowed in this case:
There is no war!
There are no orphans involved, and if there were why shouldn’t a Aa Gym be able to be fair with them?
Allah tells us “Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire: ……” 4:129Unless of course you are not using Allah’s words in Al Quran for you belief that Polygamy is allowed.
You said:
Polygamy is an avenue in Islam provided by God for those people who are not enough with one wife and their temptation is controlled by their lust!
I think it is quite clear that Polygamy is not an avenue provided by God, it is a deviation from Allah’s teachings only justified by Sunnah and Hadith, to cater for mens lusts.
Allah teaches self control and restraint, he doesn’t cater to mens lust outside of a monogamous relationship.
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Hi Mat,
I don’t care if you have studied Islamic law for thirty years or three hundred years. What I don’t agree is that you said polygamy is an avenue provided by God, if you said that polygamy is provided by God in Islam why polyandry is not? Thus my asking whether God is fair or not.
As you said polyandry is practised by some isolated chinese community, the key word here is isolated, the general Muslim community is not isolated, and we are living in a modern world.
I agree with you that Aa Gym did manipulate the rule to benefit himself, so if I may ask if a rule can be manipulated to benefit some people doesn’t that mean that this rule may need to be changed?
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Bradlymail says:
Mat Malaya your expalanation that AA Gym married for second wife was not against Islam rules. Can you show me the proofs that polygamy is not against Islam’s rules, since you claimed that you studied Islamic law for 30 years? Mohammed Khafi already explained about the 3 conditions for polygamy in Islam. It was very simple to understand. Like AA Gym’s case,he married for second wife because his sex drive is beyond control. With first wife he has 7 children, maybe he wants more to satisfy his sex drive. I will not be suprise if gonna get married for third time.
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Hi Mohammad khafi,
I noticed that u are an anti-hadith guy. Therefore, whatever your contentious is, I shall not put any of my point here to you. U sounds like u are better than Aa gym, as if God authorised u to interpret the Quran verses according to your logic without any support from hadis and Sunnah. Eventhough I’m learned in Islamic rules, still, i dare not to interpret any of the Quran verses according to my logic, afraid of being influenced by the whisper of satan. How about u my learned Islamic scholars? No wonder Indonesia has so many suicide bomber, cos their learned guru has wrongly interpreted it. You better find the right Islamic guru or a learned ustadz about your denial of Hadith and Sunnah. I wonder how u pray if u reject Hadith and Sunnah….
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Mr Dancer,
I don’t know where u got that idea that Islam forbid polygamy. Even most of the non Muslim knows about this. Only Islam allows Polygamy. What I meant is Chinese community in republic of China near to Mongolia border. There is one small community practised polyandry.
To be honest with u, I believe you know nothing about Islamic rules and the true teaching of Islam, otherwise you wont ask me about polyandry in Islam and your suggestion to change this divine law. Who are u to change those Allah’s laws?’ All laws and rules are subject to amendment except Allah’s laws’. Its not too late to learn.
I wont put any of my point here anymore, cos I’m afraid some of the Moslem outthere shall be deviated by this self interest discussions.
Salaaammm………….
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Ronald says:
Mohammed Khafi says :
Allah tells us : “Ye are never to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire……”4:129
So it’s very clear that we are never to be fair and just. Allah Himself said it to us. Why is it so difficult for AA to understand????
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althaf jibril says:
I don’t care. He is not committing adultry. He is a gentleman, not doing a backstreet affair. He is a human being with good morale. He has been doing a lot of things. Let him have fun in a legal way.
What are you people expecting from him? Example? He has shown you lots of good examples, and one controversy. Polygamy is neither bad nor good. It is just a choice of bigger responsibility, and he has already beared the responsibility of that controversy. I doubt if you people are the sorts of people who have courage to challenge that.
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Mat Malaya said:
Therefore, whatever your contentious is, I shall not put any of my point here to you.
The fact of the matter is that your Sunnah and Hadith will not stand up when faced with Al Quran, because they are manmade, possibly as you say inspired by satans whispers. The only way they can survive is by supressing debate and free speech, but you would know all about that wouldn’t you coming from Malaysia.
I don’t know where u got that idea that Islam forbid polygamy
Didn’t you read the verses quoted above? were they not clear enough for you?
No wonder Indonesia has so many suicide bomber, cos their learned guru has wrongly interpreted it.
How dare you make such a statement towards Indonesia, when so many of those so called “learned guru”, are themselves rabid supporters of Sunnah and Hadith and have come under the influence of Malaysian scholars, don’t forget that one of the major figures behind the bombings is a Malaysian citizen.
Eventhough i’m learned in Islamic rules, still, i dare not to interpret any of the Quran verses according to my logic, afraid of being influenced by the whisper of satan.
Even though Allah says in Al Quran:
“And We have indeed made the Qur’an easy to understand and remember: then is there any that will receive admonition” 54:17
We are enjoined by Allah to use our own faculties to understand Al Quran and not to just follow what we are told:
“And when it said to them: Follow what Allah has revealed. They say: Nay! we shall follow the ways of our fathers. What! even though their fathers were void of wisdom and guidance.” 2:170
“And pursue not that of which thou hast no knowledge; for surely the hearing, the sight, the heart, all of those shall be questioned of.” (17:36)
Who are u to change those Allah’s laws?’ All laws and rules are subject to amendment except Allah’s laws’. Its not too late to learn.
You are the one who is trying to change Allah’s laws, by substituting Sunnah and Hadith in their place, since when does Sunnah and Hadith supercede Al Quran. but you are right about one thing, It’s not too late to learn.
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Janma says:
The pro polygamy group say that the government has no right to interfere with peoples private lives, but most of these same people are the people who were pushing for the new APP laws against pornography, which if you consider is the same violation of peoples privacy”¦ so they are just hypocrites using their religion to indulge their own desires.
Management Qolbu?? Mendingan Management Syahwat dong! -
Salam Mohammad Khafi,
I feel bad when my Moslem brother is hurt. I’m sorry for my rude statement. Anyway, I have never says that Sunnah and Hadith shall supersede Quran. Dont get me wrong. Quran is always supreme. Imagine this; Quran is like a big watertank contains million of gallons of water. Hadith and sunah is the pipeline coming down from the said watertank, branching out and deliver water to all the houses. You need hadith and Sunah to complement anything that is not shown in Quran.
Let’s talk about solat. You will never find any sentence or surah in Quran which explain or teaching how u should solat. How many rakaat, takbir and so on. Solat was first thought to our Prophet mohammad when He was summoned by Allah to sidratul muntaha during the Isra’ & Mikraj.
My BRo, U dont have to take all kinds of hadith. Hadith divided into several categories, from the reliable to the weakest hadith. This range of hadith must be adjust according to the local’s requirements depending on countries and culture. Everything from how to perform wudu’ until to the nitty gritty things. Islam is the way of life. Everything is explained in hadith and sunnah. But until today, there is no hadith and sunnah that allows or justify the attack ang killing of innocent people. There is NO order in Hadith and sunnah that lead his followers to the wrong path. This is the part where we as a Moslems must learned all things about Islam as it is the way of life.
Yes, you are correct. I’m Malaysian but we totally condemn those two idiot bombers. Nordin mat Top and Azhari Hussein. You know why? These people has been manipulated and thought about Islam from the wrong perspective. We don’t have bombs here because no Malaysian agreed with them. That’s why they used those uneducated Indonesian to meet their ends.
To me, knowledge is important in this world no matter what. Even the first surah that was thought to Mohammad is about knowledge (“surah Al-alak”) which begins with an order to read. ( Iqra’ means Read!)
As a Moslems live in Malaysia, we never agreed to all those suicide bombers. It is totally stupid and sins. May Allah forgive all of us.
Salaaammm…….
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Mat Malaya:
Allah clearly says that His Book, Al Quran is complete, perfect and fully detailed If He wished us to do things in a certain way He would have told us in Al Quran:
“Say: Though the sea became ink for the Words of my Lord, verily the sea would be used up before the words of my Lord were exhausted, even though We brought the like thereof to help.” 18:109
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Mat,
I didn’t say that polygamy is forbidden by Islam, you said it yourself that it can be manipulated (by Aa Gym), then if this is Allah’s law why can it be manipulated by a mere man?
You said it yourself that polyandry is just practised by a small community, my question to you is this community a modern community? If it is a modern community then I accept my fault and agree that polygamy should be also exercised by modern community.
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buruh migran says:
By committing polygamy, he proved himself as a-not-gentleman-public-figure. Whatever religions behind this that he would like to practice.
We are living in era which is aimed to respect the human rights not patriarchy culture. OK, he has freedom to commit polygamy, but please limit that freedom by not supporting it and introducing it. And of course I have a freedom as well to say that he is a backward headed person by committing polygamy. I have no sympathy or pity for such a public figure.
What is fair if polygamy is allowed but not polyandry? I always thought that God is fair and wise, so, it makes me wonder why these men who is supporting polygamy but not polyandry are so damned backward.
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From Jakarta Post:
Under the 1974 Marriage Law, men are only allowed to take a second wife if their first wives are invalids, terminally ill or infertile.
Ninih Muthmainnah Muhsin certainly doesn’t appear to come under the category of infertile, she doesn’t appear to be an invalid, and I pray to God that she isn’t terminally ill. So has Aa Gym not only not met the conditions of Al Quran but also not met the conditions of our Marriage Law?
I guess we will now see how the ‘upholders of the law’ deal with this.
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housewife says:
to all people,
I don’t know it’s wrong or right but I KNOW Tete Ninih is HURT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Would you guys like to consider about it rather than discuss if you are right or wrong? If you hurt someone then it’s already wrong
If your wife wants to married a handsome guy and he will put more attention to the new guy than you, what about your feeling?
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sgn says:
[SMA Negeri 4, Bandung, 1977]
Just after having a lesson on Muslim’s Marriage matter, I asked my female classmates (there were 11 out-of 50 students in my class). My question was a simple one “Would you agree if oneday your husband wants to marry to the second wife?”. None of them said “Yes”.Now (29 years later), in the more higher education and more modern Indonesian society, will i get a different answer?
Asian women (more specifically mothers) are not in the good position when facing with the fact that their husbands are having second wife. Most of them are not in favour to ask for divorce eventhough their hurts are hurt.
– Their concerns about the future of their children
– Their concerns about the pressing from so-called “wanita shakinah” group
– Their concerns not to be called good MuslimahI know, most of clerics and followers argue that polygamy is allowed in Islam. But, if a survey conducted – I bet – Majority of Muslim girls and wives would neither support “polygamy” nor “polyandry”.
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Dear Polygamy supporters…
I have an idea to fulfill your desire on having more than one wife without hurting them. Don’t wait until you married (because most probably you would hurt your first wife), plan this before your married.
1. Date four or more girls.
2. Tell them you love them very much (of course, otherwise who wants to marry you ;-))
3. Find a good time to gather all of your girl friends and submit your proposal to marry all of them (Don’t tell lies ;-))Let see how many of your girl friends agree with your proposal. Then you could marry whoever agreed with your proposal. Happy be polygamy!!!
sgn
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Ozark Tilangmangsa says:
Dear Rini (the second wife of Gym),
Its better if you ask divorce to Gym to save Gyms reputation. If you do it, you will be rememberred as “Muslimah” who has saved a part of Moslem society for along time.
Believed me, a pretty and smart woman like you will be not difficult to get the real Moslem gentlemen to become your husband. -
Boniangga Anugrah says:
Dear all,
I have always believed in Quran but I strongly believe this matter has been always taken into the wrong way. Eventhough, Poligamy is not forbidden it is also not encouraged.
During the prophets’ time, many of our prophets did it to save the women from commiting sin.
But on this matter, what is the reason? We know that Rini works in banking industry, so it is definite that it is not because Aa wanted to save Rini and her family in terms of financial reason.
Moreover, I am strongly dissapointed in Aa Gym. Cause He’s being egoistic here. Especially when I heard his interview when he stated,” This is the decision that I’ve made by considering all the reason.”
He also mentioned,” At first Teteh couldn’t accept it, but now she’s starting to learn how to “Iklas”.”
I must say Aa, You have dissapointed lots of people even the nation itself. You are a disgrace! And from now on, the person I used to look up to is dead.
Sorry for being a bit sarcastic, but seriously it is all a matter of freedom of speech. -
Jaka Tingkir says:
so what if he DID taken a second wife???
“dianya adem aje, kenape elo yang sewot?”
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Intermezzo….
Below is nothing to do with religion. It’s just a novel, I read when I was 11 years old and later I had the oportunity to have in DVD. The title is “Demi Gods and Semi Devils”, or “Pendekar Negeri Tayli”, or “Thian Long Ba Bu”, or “The Heaven Dragons – Eight Episodes”.
There were many characters and stories in it, but in regard to “polygamy” I got the following synopsis…
Duan Yu is a prince of Da Li who doesn’t like learning kungfu. He begins his journey looking for his love. Although he never asks to learn kungfu, he falls to the bottom of a mountain where he finds a statue of a goddess-like lady and it forces him to learn kungfu to escape from it. With his new-found kungfu, he starts his romantic journey meeting a lot of pretty girls.
He finally finds out that they are actually all his sisters. It is revealed that Duan Yu’s father, Duan ZhengChun – a prince – had flirted around with a lot of women that resulted in Duan Yu having a lot of sisters he never knew he had. Ironically, all of Duan Yu’s sisters, who have no clue as to their actual relationship, are attracted to him and they make him promise marriage. However, none of that becomes reality. His father always appears at the right time and the right place to reveal that all girls he met are Duan Yu’s half-sisters.
The story was twisted, when Duan Yu’s mother releaved that he is not Duan ZhengChun’s son, but the son of the bad guy in the world. Duan Yu’s mother was very sad knowing that her husband have another wives, in turn – as a revenge – she gave her body to the dirties guy (later became the bad guy).
As all facts releaved, Duan Yu’s mother – before she died – allowed Duan Yu to marry all girls he likes. Will Duan Yu’s marry all of pretty girls closed to him?
I like the story and most of the girls and ladies are pretty. Here is the link to its forum http://wuxiamania.phorumz.com/wuxiamania-about87.html
Keep cool.
sgn -
Jaka Tingkir says:
Teh Ninih is not hurt, just ask her!
If you say she’s hiding her feelings, how can you tell? are you a psychotherapist / psychic?
Mind your own business, as I said, “orangnya adem aje, kenape ente yang sewot!”
Comment on “Abdullah Aa Gym Gymnastiar”.
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Everyone,
Frankly, I am more concerned about the Abd. Kareems than the Aa Gyms of this world. What do the thoughts of people like Kareem say about people who embrace Islam? Devout followers of Islam must reject attitudes promoted by Kareem and his like, who not only damage the cause of women, but also mature, sensible men everywhere.
Kareem, do you realize that there are even species in the animal kingdom where monogamity and fidelity are prized above infedility like the crane who keeps one mate for life? People like you are actually worse than the chimpanzee species, which regularly indulges in free sex, because God has gifted you with the ability to restrain yourself, whereas the chimp is not so blessed. Pity on you!